I Guess I Never Really Made This Clear...

I'll spoon-feed it to you:
It has become evident that at least one, but more likely a few, U.S. Government investigative agencies are interested in my services. While I am not lost on the fact that the core reason behind this interest is to "absorb" a "free-spirited" man they've failed repeatedly to "lop off", and whose politically independent, accurate writing is something they just can't have; while I am aware that my life has been hijacked and violated to a degree that is impossible to quantify; while I know that many individuals have experienced great joy from seeing me suffer; while I know that many of the FBI agents who have harassed me over the past years knew damn-well I was innocent and that all of it was part of a politically-motivated campaign of defamation; while knowing that they tried to label me insane for the sake of marginalizing me and destroying my life; while knowing all that plus more about which I'm sick of writing, I can safely say that those things are not the reason I wouldn't be caught dead working for the U.S. Government in ANY capacity.
Nope, the reason I'm looking forward to the joy of saying no is something I mentioned in the earliest days of this blog. Since the significance of it has apparently been dismissed by all you folks who somehow have enough fucking audacity to look at me with those smug smirks insinuating that I have no choice in this matter, I will repeat it here:
In 2003, while I was acting as primary caregiver for my mother, we made a trip to Florida to visit my brother. On the flight, some official lookin fella was in his seat when we boarded before everyone else. We boarded first because my mother, suffering--dying very, very slowly, in fact-- from ALS, was wheelchair-bound as she gradually became paralyzed by a disease she'd already seen take 2 of her siblings. Mr. Federal Agent was seated about 3 or 4 rows behind us and maybe a seat or 2 to the left. I noticed when I first sat down that he was looking at me very intently. When I looked back again, he was still looking at me with a very mean look and was sweating and visibly shaking. This continued throughout the flight.
As a pilot helped me carry my mother to her wheelchair after landing, I glanced over and saw the agent let out a noticeable sigh. When my brother pulled up to pick us up at the airport, he came around the car, looked at me with a theatrical expression of puzzlement and said, "Huh--you made it?" He then rubbed his chin and acted like he was trying to figure out what to do next.
But again, all that is STILL not the reason I would NEVER work for the U.S. Goverment. Nope--getting fuckin' chumped by con-artist Scientologist angry at the world because of his "short"-comings is something I can look past. My brother's very sick. That doesn't mean he's stupid.
The reason I will never work for the U.S. Government is because at the security checkpoint before boarding the plane, as a couple monstrous sheriff's deputies stood with their arms crossed (black guys, yet) giving me the hardest, most intimidating looks they could, a security guard completely molested my dying mother as she sat helpless in her wheelchair. On top of that, the guard was clearly a lesbian. My mother was in tears. I was in shock and many people in line where aghast as well. My mother was as good an American as I've ever known an the insult from that day is off the chart. The bitch stuck her hand between her legs.
I love my country, but something has gone seriously wrong.
This is the last time I'm going to say this: cut me a check for my "training" (years of tortuous hell which included intense psychological abuse and several attempts at entrapment) and I'll be happy to be on my way and I promise I will NEVER come back.

Sent from my BlackBerry® on the MetroPCS Network

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