"Life Is Cheap"

This very strange guy just told me, "Life is cheap."...twice. And made some other strange comments about what he does and what I do or something like that.  Then he got up to leave and zipped his bag very violently apparently in an attempt to intimidate me.  Oh, wait...I remember now.  I laughed at his attempts to intimidate me and he said, "You're gonna eat that laugh."  Really?  Am I?  I'm not asking much.  In fact, in the big picture, it's nothing. 

Three o'clock.

http://www.indiegogo.com/SportsGreatsJournalismArchive

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Um...Let's See...

How do I get this message across effectively?............

Since I have no other way to respond to these messages from your street ops, I'm compelled to do it here because I know you or someone close enough to you is reading.  Let's see:

If you obtain joy and satisfaction from bossing around "50-year-old white guys," I do not begrudge you that.  At the same time, it's not something that impresses me or appeals to me.  But it's not the content of the messages you send occasionally that makes me like you less and less.  Rather, it's the disturbing method of delivery, taking advantage of the fact that you've isolated me with defamation and misinformation with the intention of blackmailing me.  And of course, I never have any witnesses to the these disturbingly random yet clearly intentional encounters.  Like your predecessor, you apparently have a penchant for abuse of power and have done just that to put me in a position in which I'm sure most would cave and kneel down and scream, "I love big brother."  ("Big brother"--how ironic.  The situation gets more bizarre by the minute.)   The truth is that, though my overriding opinion will continue to be that you handle the job well, your insistence on continuing to communicate to me in this disturbing fashion while systematically keeping me in a desperate position really just makes me think you're nothing but another asshole politician as so many others, including a few anti-establishment-type folks, think.  I don't care how many black guys you send at me who look like they went to Georgetown.  I don't care how many Harvard drunks I run into occasionally who suggest living out of a van has been good for me.  You've really soured me on any potential relationship and to be perfectly straight-forward, I'm not interested at all, so stop wasting your time.

I will not starve again and I will never beg on the street as you tried to have your dumb-fuck drone teach me to do properly while wearing his $500-spectacles the other day.  Your drones don't impress me at all and you impress me less and less.  I am not interested in being part of your or anyone else's conspiracy, especially one who's leader/s are under the delusion that they have the right to tell me how to think and/or how to behave by basically training me like a dog through the use of very, very abusive methods.  And I haven't even touched on the violation of my privacy.  Like so many others in my life, you've turned a friend into an apathetic bystander thinking strictly about himself--for the first time.  You haven't helped me to grow and living out of the van has not been beneficial at all.  Because of this continued bizarre approach, I've come to the conclusion that I'd rather flip burgers than work for you.   You're wasting your time and you have more important things to do--as do I.  Please stop.  It is never going to happen.

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We're Arent Going to Start This Again Are We

...with your dumb-fucks walking by my van in the wee hours of the morning and making comments to fuck with my head precisely as they walk by?  I think today makes twice in about the last week.  Message specifically to the guy this morning from around 5:45:  You're a pussy.  What's really bizarre about this is that a substantial portion of the people doing this are black.  I mean, I don't expect any gifts or anything from anybody, but to actively take part in this?  Wow.

Do me one favor... approach me openly, name yourself, your organization, and your reason.  No, that's not going to happen because anyone who would take part in such a thing must be a complete dumb-fuck pussy--including the guy making it happen.

How many times do I have to call you out?

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"Tell Me About Your Diet"

In late 2010, while waiting for my food-stamps, I was very clearly grossly underweight.  This guy  actually rubbed it in my face directly and openly:

What is it that makes your dumb-fucks think I'm ever going to quit or stop or cooperate with whatever it is you want, of which I'm not really sure anyway?  This guy's name is Don and I'm pretty sure he said he works at the Asia Museum of SF.

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Spastic Biz Guys

I didn't look at the video until now.  Those first 2 gestures the guy in the blue makes are meant to signal his partner that the camera is rolling and to stop the act.  He also very briefly shakes his head, "no," right after the second one and acts nervous throughout the video (the best part is that I look bored):

Let's see, what else can I tell ya?...

It's a memory game, right?  What's the most obscure little detail I could run by ya.  hmmmm...

Well...the day I dropped a hint to Wayne that my brother framed me was on or the day before or the day after either March 23 or April 21.  Noooo...of course, I'd remember that one.  Sentimental, aren't I?

Wait, wait...something very obscure that I haven't mentioned..."Stay out of the power doors".......nope...already mentioned that one....what else?.......Everyone at the dinner table theatrically eating with their mouths open?   ........nope......already told ya about that one......Marty Eggert....."Why you leavin' the state?"  Buzzzzzzz...wrong again....already went over that.  Something from Severstal...let's see....

"Stay out of the power doors" is key to everything and it's very fitting because Wayne got that message across by way of a subtle grammatical mistake.  One doesn't stay out of a door.  One stays out of the room a door leads to.  I have to give Wayne credit for that one, as much of a mistake as I suspect it's going to turn out to be.  I didn't think he had any writer in him.  Basically, if one wanted to make a euphamism for powerful corporate and/or political interests and wanted to use the word "power," preceding something, then "door" would make much more sense than "room," now wouldn't it?  If Wayne wasn't trying to send me a little message, he'd have said, "Stay out of the power room."  Taken literally, "power door" makes no sense in that usage.

I know I'm leaving out something obscure that I haven't yet mentioned............  Maybe not.  Perhaps all has been told.  Rick: "Sacrifice the one for the many."

Oh, here's a great one I believe I've left out:

One of the things my brother told me under hypnotism was to occasionally breath like an asthmatic so I would know how he felt.  I figured that out partly from memory and partly from wondering why the hell I do that occasionally.  I did it right after he snapped me out of it and my sister threw a theatrical fit of shocked disbelief.  (I come from a family of douche-bag fucking posers.  I'm not sure which is the bigger drama queen--my brother or my sister.  It's a toss-up.)  Of course, since I figured that out, I've stopped it almost completely.  I can't remember what else he said, but I'm sure it's pretty bad.  Cool, huh?  I remember something someone told me while hypnotized.  It's not supposed to work that way.  It's just amazing I can't get someone to address me openly about all this.

I got a message from Niles recently, btw--I think.  The language is suspicious, but the address looks legit.  Looking forward to finding out what's up, Himmy Who-Haws.  

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Hey...What's it going to take...

to get it through to you guys that I am not cut out for this stuff?  Anybody who knows me at all will tell you that.  That single successful punch was all I needed for a certain amount of satisfaction and clarity.  Whoever picked me for this is just plain wrong in his thinking.  I know, I'm tall, etc., etc.  I suspected that guy from the second I saw him, though and I could tell he wasn't really drunk.  If he really wanted something to happen, he shouldn't have started giving me tips about form.  I wasn't positive about him until that point, though it should have been obvious despite the ambiguity.  You know--I never have an outside frame of reference.  I'm a writer.  Just give me a non-fighting writing job.  The Streets Blog job sounds like a great job.  Paying blog jobs are rare.

Seriously...I never showed interest in this stuff.  I know, Iknow--like Rick said, "You don't pick them, they pick you," but still--I would think you'd want someone who's heart's in it, no?  I thought Kudary was going to cry when he found out.  "Why him?"  You should have seen his face; ask Wayne.  Paul's a big burly dude.  He's tall.  He's pretty smart.  He might not have "a mind like a steel trap" (like I do--apparently), but he's smart.  He could reach over the crowd and crush somebody's head with one hand and most importantly he's not chicken-shit--like me!  All things considered, I think he'd make a fine replacement.  I worked with him and I highly recommend him.  Good guy.  Maybe a little racist and maybe he made a comment about using a black girl for his "first," but otherwise, super guy, for sure.  Yeah--the name's Paul Kudary.  Paul...Kudary.  On top of everything else that was going on, I had to work in an 8x10 cube with that doofus all...day.  (I'm a good writer, aren't I?  Yes, yes, I know.)

"I like your style, but lift your arms up a little bit."  That's funny.

Send me a check for my trouble and leave me alone.

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"Uh-ohhhh...Which way?"

Versatile Multi-Media; Pinpoint Communications

So...I was walking up Sutter Street toward Van Ness from Polk St.  A new building is going up on the corner  of Van Ness and  Polk.  Adjacent to the new building on Sutter is a furniture store.   These 2 pricks and a female friend, who were walking about 15 feet ahead of me, stopped in front of the furniture store window which is immediately before the temporary covering over the sidewalk.  They whipped up a bullshit conversation, and as I passed, the prick on the right made a loud comment about sleeping in a nice warm bed every night.  I kept right on walking and heard them take a few steps into the tunnel behind me and stop.  I exited the tunnel and, despite the fact that I paused for a moment or two before I decided to wait and get the video, the guys still didn't emerge until 50 seconds later.  It's not that long of a walk, but that's really inconsequential at this point.

As they emerge, the guy on the right makes an audible verbal expression of dismay at my presence, which he clearly attempts to suppress, before he stammers through trying to figure out which way these sharp, upstanding fellas were headed.  In fact, it's quite clear that he was pretty nervous.  Of course, it was a little dark when they emerged from the tunnel, so I took extra care to get their faces as best I could.  Me and my damn loser television production experience!!

 



Did I spell "versatile" right?

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"Is Someone Sitting Here?" #63

Learning and Growing

Suggestions that this whole process is meant to "help me grow" continue.  The very notion that some of the idiots involved in this, especially the dumb-fuck behind it all, are in a position to teach me anything, is just a bit silly.  You've taught me nothing.  I see the abuse and damage I've been subject to.  The group and every individual in it is a pathetic fucking joke in my book.  Here's what we've learned:  it takes many, many people working together and endless deception and deceit to fuck with John--at all.  I promise--in the end, you will  have learned from me.  I'm pursuing the same thing I was in '08.  You've taught me nothing.  Nothing.

My New Youtube Friend

Hmmmm...this Youtube user added me as a friend.  How interesting.  Remind you of anyone?...




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Dim Mak

I'd searched for an account of this online since I posted about it, but wasn't able to find any until now...

   

       
       

            MANswers
       

   

http://www.spike.com/video-clips/fywg53/manswers-is-the-death-touch-real

And Now...

a fella from a certain Pittsburgh suburb is lookin' at me.

How fucking fascinating.

Is Anyone Sitting Here?

Another very popular method these people like to use to screw with me is to arrive at a table adjacent to mine that very obviously is not occupied and ask, "Is anyone sitting here?"  This guy and is friend just did that.   I asked them about and she said there was a glass of water on the table and tried to carry on the conversation which I cut off when she said, "I'm generally a mean person, so..."



Nice try.

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Idiot Savant

A few have suggested and/or insinuated that I am an idiot savant, that I can't take care of myself.  A quick review for those dumb-fucks in particular:

I supported myself during the bulk of the time I spent in college.  I graduated as the youngest of  3 siblings with no 4-year-degree precedent in my immediate family.  I moved to New York awwe by mysewf with the intention of  getting into television production and did just that--in record time, all while being covertly targeted by Neo-Nazis and other far-right extemists.  My television career ended directly because of harassment by a Neo-Nazi.  After 9/11, the economy in the city went down the tubes.  I returned home in large part because my mother was terminally ill, to take the burden off of my family.   I moved to Columbus for a few years where I once again took care of myself just fine.  I then moved back to Niles, again, in part because my father was in ailing health.  This was before I knew about the Nazis and the past girlfriends all being Christian operatives and the fact that my family had framed me and tried to kill me more than once and that it was all connected.  Then I figured it all out while being stalked by Neo-Nazis, radical feminists, and federal authorities and drove all the way across the country only to get  shit on nearly constantly in San Francisco.  Oh--and I nearly forgot to mention the blog-posts and retired sheriff's deputy, Wayne Carderelli's threat to "stay out of the power doors."  That one actually came after all his veiled threats involving sharpshooters.  (Go fuck yourself, Wayne.)

The beauty of this situation for me is that I know the head douche-bag who's making all of this disturbing abuse happen doesn't have the balls to face me, name himself and his group, and take responsibility.  Never did.  Never will.  I guess that illustrates and important point about anonymity.  Any pussy--like the one who shouts things in my window during the wee hours of the morning--could take part in what's being done to me while hiding behind anonymity.  It's really sad.

(This might be my favorite post in the whole blog.)

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No More 7:30am Messsages...

from that putz who's been doing it all week.  Positive or negative, they do not effect me.  The manipulation and tracking will end.  None, nothing, nada, zip.  It stops.  It's done.

Life Advice

I'm still not sure who exactly is behind this stupid-ass little charade, but I promise you--I do not  need your little pieces of life advice.  I see right through your game--right through it.  Stop trying with the false Twitter accounts, etc.  A piece of advice for you:

Mind your own fucking business.

MiyAko Abe ??

I recall this person specifically telling me her name is MiyOko. Why would you spell your own name wrong on your Facebook page?  ...

http://www.facebook.com/miyako.abe?sk=wallhttp://www.facebook.com/miyako.abe?sk=wall


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Memo to the Democratic Party Operatives Who Won't Leave Me Alone

Go fuck yourself...please!  And whoever it was that walked by my van the other morning and called me a "lightweight", be assured--I positively do not give a shit what you think.  Not one bit.  It's a dumb-fuck game played by dumb-fucks--from both parties--which I never agreed to.

Education Management

"My Life's an Experiment.".... "Education  Management."..... Linkedin profile that looks like it was just made with no info or contacts.